20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

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I feel like shit (potentially affecting my relationship)
I'm getting married early next year and I'm feeling very overwhelmed by what transpired yesterday. It was my first time in a long time going to JB. Didn't expect much as I only wanted a massage. Long story short, me and ML teased each other and I didn't think clearly at that point and I was horny that I asked if can do vaginal intercourse a bit and she at first hesitated cause of the noise then allowed me to. Just putting it in and trusting for about 10 seconds, I ejaculated into her (unprotected). Everything. After ejaculation and my dick being in there for another good 5-8 seconds. I suddenly realised I fucked up big big time.

After the massage, the masseuse didn't make a big fuss of it (she's Viet). Looks to be in her mid 30s or early 40s. Paid her and was about to leave when she suddenly took her phone out while on a video call with someone and I can see she's clearly pointing at my direction. i suspect taking a photo of me. Anyone encountered this situation before? What if she took a photo of me as proof and happens to be pregnant then tried to get some ah long to find me? Or threatend me to in sg to go back and find her to be responsible for the kid? And potentially my fiance finding one

So now I'm extremely paranoid. I've already gone to doctors this morning and prescribed PEP. Will do regular checkup as well for other std. In the meantime, I may have to come up with excuse for no sex till I'm cleared.

I feel like absolute shit. That 20 seconds of pleasure was not worth the after thought and now im just so defeated. My wallet is burned from the PEP. My relationship with fiance could also be potentially ruined if I come up with some STD. But I'm more concerned about the ML getting pregnant and finding me, leading to my fiance knowledge on the matter and everything we've planned for is now in shambles.

I feel super remorseful. I can't function normally. Everytime I see my fiancé planning out wedding, I feel like crying and hope I just die before that.

Can anyone advice? I'm taking measures right now to get myself medicated and tested for 1 month, 3 and 6. Anything I should be doing to stay calm and not worry?

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Relax bro , Don't think too much about things already done. Look forward and settle things one at a time.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

You have to control your emotions and think more on a positive note. Being negative doesn’t help you much.

1) did you pay with any credit card or anything that can trace to your identity? As you mentioned, you have long to travel to JB, needless to say, massage there. So if you didn’t leave any trace behind that can identify you, I think the chances of her from Malaysia locating you in Singapore despite any means, is quite low.

2) if it’s unprotected sex, you are still subjected to the risk of being infected. You are doing the right thing to get tested and abstaining sexual activities with your fiancée. Remember to maintain till you get cleared from STD, if not if she’s infected with STD prior to you being cleared, you will have a hard time explaining.

3) HIV testing should also be regular tested.

Lesson learnt now, no point brooding over a bottle of spilled milk. You should learn to move on and not suicidal thoughts. Everybody makes mistakes. Now to redeem that guilt, spend more effort in making your fiancée happy.

Cheers

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Thanks a lot for the kind words bro.

1) I paid all in cash. Also while I was showering, didn't see her really clear the discharge after I ejaculated and seemingly act normal cleaning the room. Normally they'd run to the toilet to push out the semen. And during the time I showered, she could have run through my bag and took a photo of my passport or ic. This is also potentially another aspect I didn't consider. Im also scared she post on some sex telegram group and some of my friends who are regular chiongers will identify and baotoh me. Or worst case, some white knights chiongster go help her and expose me 😔

2) and 3) yes I'm doing everything I can do make sure that we abstain from sex. If she ever suspects and press me enough and ask why I never do, I'll probably come clean but better that way. At least she's protected.

I'm trying to think positive but my head keeps telling me all the what ifs. Then there's the variables of getting caught to go to the clinic to get tested and medications etc. if her friends saw me or what not idk man ☹️

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

You're catastrophizing. Just relax and take things easy.

https://psychcentral.com/lib/what-is-catastrophizing

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

These are working ladies. Even if you shoot into them during unprotected sex, who's to say that she doesn't allow others to do it too? Can be anyone's child if she gets pregnant.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

I think u no need to worry abt them finding u... cos u paid for the service unless u didnt paid for the service.. they will come after u.. and tbh.. u really love ur wife to be? cos if u really lover her.. u wont be doing what ubhad done in the first place.. u only need to worry if u kenna AIDS..

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Idk if it's catastrophizing but I'm trying to be pragmatic. So many variables from photo taking, to showering potentially taking a photo of my ID and claim pregnancy. All these can lead to long lasting effects down the line. I just feel extremely jaded. I don't even want to work, meet my fiancée or do anything as a matter of fact. I just want to lie down, wait for my medication to finish for pep and retest. Even so, going to JB to find her and check if she's pregnant might put some easy to my sanity. But then again I don't know. Read on here some bros said that the last thing ML want is a kid and would rather have std than the latter. So they will die die eat contraception or plan B after. Now sure how accurate this is. I did tip her btw. So it's not like I didn't pay.

I tried using chat gpt and they said chances of pregnancy 5-10%, std 0.05-20%, chances of blackmail threatening etc - only if she is pregnant and wants me claim then can. If no footprint and if she didn't take a photo of my passport or IC, it's close to zero. Based on your experience here for some time, do you think over thinking things? So far haven't read any thread of chiongster getting contacted by ML for paternity test or keep the baby after shooting inside. Let alone sg to JB side.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

I do. But in a moment of weakness, dry spell. Haven't had sex in almost a year with her. I went with it. Now I'm suffering from the repercussions of my actions.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Just dont think abt it.. cos u will still go find a ML or FL.. hahaha.. just make sure u are clear from STDs... anyway.. which shop u went to at JB.. i will avoid that shop and ML.. if she dont mind letting guys to go RAW and cum in her.. i better avoid.. BBBJ also can kenna STDs..

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Relax la bro. If she let you shoot inside without fuss, she prolly on med to prevent pregnancy. As for finding you, I think close to 0 chance la. Don't overthink. Unless you're elon musk/bill gates, no incentive for her to find you take responsibility if she is indeed pregnant.

Only thing now you need to worry is whether you gotten anything from her. HIV wise, kinda covered with PEP. So just take the meds, go for the next testing and see results.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

bro, think logically for a while, like what other bros said,

1) don't catch any std, this one you already go for pep and all liao, usually quite ok, hiv from sex is about 1 percent risk, if you take pep should be even better, other disease have cure

2) whether she will get pregnant, I'm sure it's not her first rodeo, and you're not her first rider, she will ownself settle ownself. i think it's neigh impossible for her to come find you like those tvb drama

3) your own mental state with your fiancee . what done is done, if you still want to be with her, just treat her better and don't do this again, but if you can't get over it, tell the truth and be prepared to lose her. thinking of the past doesn't help, you need a future plan to go forward

wish you the best bro.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Thanks so much bro. I think I really needed to hear this from someone. I cried reading this. It doesn't mean a lot to some but it means the world to me. I will go for the pep appointment and don't think so much about what happened. And focus on my fiancée. This is probably one of those life lessons you do and it will haunt you regardless but it's a good reminder to be faithful and to never ever do again. I will update my test results time and time again after my 28 days pep and if I catch any other things in between.

Other than that, thank you bros on here for listening and providing me with ample of advice. Maybe living isn't so bad afterall.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Do NOT ever confess to what you did. It will make things worse not better.

Re: 20 seconds of pleasure and potentially a whole lifetime of problems
 

Will heed your advice bro. At most just say can't do cause don't feel like it