Single Parent
 

I'm a 30-year old, divorced with 2 young kids. For the last 2 years of divorce, I've been spending all my time and energy on my kids. Recently, I've been feeling very drained and find my life getting very monotonous.

I do love my kids and enjoy spending whatever time I have, especially now they do not have a father figure in their life.

Thinking back, I don't know how I cope when my ex left the family, but 2 years on now, I'm moving on with my life and my priority is on my kids.

Sometimes I feel that all my time and attention is devoted on my kids and I hardly have any time for myself. Some days, it gets depressing when I think how I still have a long way to go being alone and facing challenges by myself.

Recently my gf has asked me if I would give dating another go. I find myself with a mixture of feelings:- I miss the feeling of dating and falling in love again, but at the same time, I'm afraid to try and get hurt again. Besides, I've 2 kids to consider and which man would consider a divorcee with baggage?

Even if fate has it that I find someone I have feeling for, what are the odds he will accept my kids and my kids will like him too?

I wonder if any single parents out there feel guilty at the thought of dating again? Already I find there's never enough time to juggle between work and kids - how do you find time to date without spending lesser time with the kids?

Re: Single Parent
 

erogirl

I have 2 childhood friends who were divorced, 1 got 1 kid and the other 3 kids.
The 1st lady got married again last year and had another baby recently.
The second lady friend have been dating her new BF for almost 2 yrs. Both their partners didn't mind their past and the extra burden......

Having said that, hope you will find your happiness soon:D

Re: Single Parent
 

jia you.
life goes on..
so what you felt is right, never look back and regret, never do this never do that..

Re: Single Parent
 

Have you watched the movie Blended (Sandler and Barrymore)?

Re: Single Parent
 

I have chiobu divorced fren with kids and re-married...
Go out, meet people, and keep your options open.
All the best!

:D

Re: Single Parent
 

u come here to seek advice? most of us are lost and troubled souls

if we knew what to do with our lives we wouldnt be hanging around a sex forum looking for dont know what

:p:p

Re: Single Parent
 

Re: Single Parent
 

U got anymore chiobu divorcee to intro ?

:D

Re: Single Parent
 

the odds are better if you go for an older mature man.

at 30 with 2 kids by yourself, you have to be a super woman to be anything.

Re: Single Parent
 

Amazing mother

Re: Single Parent
 

Sis. erogirl, the beauty in you is the perseverance of getting things going regardless of how tough it has been for you. On average, a lady who is in your shoes may takes up to 5 years to be back on track. & since you already have a mixture of feelings to or not to date just after 2 years had already shown you are back on a fast & healthy track. :)

If you are looking at dating someone who can fit into the gap, be by your side, contributing by managing the family, kids, finances, etc... it may not sounds promising. You may even feel/ get disappointed unless he is someone who doesn't wants kids himself. He can loves you for who you are doesn't means he must have to love your kids. Can you draw the line between you & him versus you & kids?

If you are looking at a date with objectives in mind to settle down, you have unknowingly added new weights of pressure on yourself. But if you date with no objectives of settling down, it fears you to move one step forward because you know it is leading you to Holland. This is the dilemma you are experiencing. Did I understand you in this part?

There is absolutely no sense of negative feel should you decided to date 1 boy, 5 men, 25 uncles, etc... as long that makes you happy. Just that by the time you are going to bring your date home, the kids should already be well mentally prepared that they are going to welcome a new 'visitor' be it he is the plumber, contractor, professor back to 'their' home.

How do you find time to date without spending lesser time with the kids? - I seriously have no idea. I can only think of not putting on a watch & not looking at the clock. Just joking. :p

Re: Single Parent
 

This is just a suggestion. Are there any activities that you can join where you can bring your kids to and meet single parents like yourself? My guess is chances are better that you can find a good match.

All the best!

Re: Single Parent
 

Sad to hear that... But well, you are still young. Should go for dating again. How old are your kids btw?

My ex wife is a single parent of 2 kids when we got to know each other as well. We went through up and down together, and was helping her all along as a good friend... We went out like couple, and family... However eventually we fell for one another, and even got married one day. We had another daughter together after marriage, but due to some mishap, we divorced last year...

What I'm trying to say is... Yes. There maybe many who can't accept the kids which are not theirs. But there are still some whom will. Not really you have to go into 'dating'. Can try go out as friends, and let natural goes. If both have sparks in between, who know? Maybe you will find your other half soon one day

Re: Single Parent
 

you are amazing as a mother :)

Re: Single Parent
 

As amazing as you are now, gif yourself another chance at love life, gif your children another chance to have a father figure. Only downside is that you'll only know if that little lamb will turn into a lion after marriage or not, it's a gamble though.

There are real life cases which works out fine and there'll always be those that becums more sad than happy ending.

Any ways cheers to you.