Technically, you are considered adult. You are free to make own decision either way no matter what you choose, only you can determine your own guilt,pleasure, regret, anxiety level... I think you are "over-thinking" IMO...
You letting your family upbringing influence your thinking - be that good or bad, again only you can answer.
Sammster's here say... be a man, go for it, save it, go find love, etc. etc..
We all have made choices in life, some we regret, some we don't... up to individual to understand the impact...
Regardless of what you decide, if you go to P4P to "lose it" then let the provider know it's your "1st time" she hopefully will be flattered and try to make it special for you... that would save you the embarrassment of fumbling/bumbling with a GF, if you find one.
Alternatively, have you discussed with your platonic female friends ? Anyone of them take an interest ? You can make it like a science experiment - biology lesson, learning experience, whatever you want to call it.
As for how it will feel, depends on the size condom you use and the tightness of the pussy you push into..
Just don't try to bang like a porn star on your 1st go mate... me thinks, it won't last that long for you anyway, but that's just my guess...
Every guy remembers his 1st time just as every woman.. it's up to you to decide how you want to remember it and who you choose to do it with.
You can try to "sell" your virginity to highest bidder as well
girls have been doing that for ages... 21st century now, got some cougar willing to pay I'm sure you never thought of that angle lah ?
Good luck and keep us posted on what happens...