[Kualalumpur]

Originally Posted by Mode

After reading most the pages, i would just like to make some little comments here.

Getting a Vietnamese life partner, u gotto to understand their culture - yr life partner culture and their families culture. it's seem silly for mi to say that but it's truth especially gals from HCMC.

May I dare to be a little bit harsh? I think their main problem is a LACK of culture, not a culture to understand. When I listen to the little kinds of 7 years old joking about money, Dat Qua, etc... and even in restaurants the couples, the families, love to talk about the money, too expensive, that guy paid too much, he has been cheated. Same speech, relentlessly, restlessly.

To get a proper VNese wife, you have to take her not too old, and teach her from the ground that money is not the center of the Universe, and that everything has a financial value, of course but as well an emotional, cultural value. They do not understand usually, even in mid-high class families, the cultural value. From that, everything is corrupt in their minds, because everything is related to the money.

The whole marriage last for 2 years as I got married after 1.5 years of together. Vietnamese girl dosent believe in long term of marriage even how you provide her with $ or love.

You are wrong, there is NEVER ever enough $ no matter her family wealthyness. It is part of many families education. Jump to the next, and to the next... Canadians VK were said to be more and more wealthy, therefore a good prey, and there has been a fashion to drop the local VNeses for a Canadian VQ some years ago, in the early 2000's.

Now it has changed for Germans VK and US VK.

Of course, they will never speak about the money matter, but that's the key point in their lives for many.

which last oso another 2 years. Last year she was re-married again to a local Pure Vietnamese which is just a odd-job worker for a Japanese Construction Company. She gave birth to a kid that belongs to the VQ and the kid follow the father instead to the mother cuz most of the divorcing cases, the mother would not want the kid.

Yep, Japaneses companies were said to be very easy to cheat, rightfully if you look at the ODA stories thoses last few months, so VNeses working for such companies were said to be potentially very wealthy very soon. Prooved to be wrong, but anyway.

The child story is maybe common in HCMC, but in Hanoi it is the opposite, they choose the husband to feed the kids and the parents. Note that the kids do not, and will never, belong to the father in most families. The father is there to pay and arrange everything, that's all.

Her wife had been keeping a man behind him and even let the man in to his house for the FJ. When she was confront by many of us, the wife just dun bother to have any explanation and leave the hse.

Extremely common story. I do not know any VN/foreigner couples in VN where there has never been such stories. VN wives of foreigners are not very serious if they have the chance to stay in VN, believe me on that. There has always been in the people I know a VNese "Tinh Yeu" behind, sometimes just waiting for his hooker/sweet wife to extract this and that from the foreigner, or just for FJ. Some couples accept and life must go on, especially if you are trapped with kids, others just collapse.

Apparently in HCMC, they can drop the kids, but in Hanoi, they keep the kids and throw away the husband if they have opportunity for a better one. I even got the joke happening to 2 of my friends during pregnancy. Gal pregnant 5-6 months, went back to her family, did not want to sleep with her husband, born the baby, then a year later court, divorce...

One of the favorite gals statements when they have divorced is to say their husband has been out with prostitutes, or unfaithful. They will spread that all around especially if the husband is a foreigner, and he has no chance to fight back if he does not speak vietnamese.

Originally Posted by SING_IN_HCMC

Bro, cam on.
Yes, I alos know that Vn gal are fiercely loyal and cannot accept their man to lie. But I when I saw her, I was like...wow, this is a cute chick who is also intelligent.

You are completely wrong about fiercely loyal, especially to a foreigner. But as a foreigner you cannot find out by yourself. VN gals rarely tell you the truth.

Second, if she is clever, she can keep you on hold, and take whatever she can out of you, even so called friendship, chinese lessons, whatever little or big as long as it is not costly for her in a way or another and drop you later. Never mistake about that, and keep your eyes wide open, they can play a lot to get little.

From my experience, you can be really stunned at the sophisticated schedule some gals and men actually in VN can do to cheat you of nearly nothing.

Some even from rich families can even play around you, kiss you, say that maybe one day they will like to be your girlfriend, just to get invitations to exhibitions or shitty cheap things. I got burned a couple of times before understanding that.

At the KFC last year, near my office, they gave tickets for 20 per cent discount for the new opening of a KFC in Hanoi. You had women with deluxe cars + drivers and their kids, fighting and waiting for hours to get the discounted KFC tickets for next week opening. Maybe worth 2-3US.

And do not mistake, most Vietnameses are far, far walthier than any Singaporean. You would be surprised, they will never show it up right in front of you, especially in Hanoi.