Originally Posted by pitabooom
Its crazy that I have to turn here to vent and get things outta my chest. Married for 8yrs with 1 kid.
During the initial phase of relationship, my gf knew I had other girls before. Being completely honest with her about some sexual mistakes in my life is perhaps the worst thing any man could do. However, looking back, I'd thought it would be good to be honest.
After marriage, initially it was the once a month quarrel. It started from small things - from either doing things a little slow or perhaps it was my earnings, else it would be something else - a mistake from my past, etc.
After child was born, knowing full well that I am not earning a lot; busted my arse working 2 jobs (my day job and a Uber driver) to cover my credit card bills paying off quite abit of bills and avoided touching my wife's money as far as possible. Even then, she had continued on her tirade every now and then. Even to the point of telling me - to leave the house with my child.
Fast forward to 8yrs on. Just as I'd thought when things had settled down, she went on another crazy spree. One that just involves her demands for me to pick up the phone instantly, regardless - even when I am asleep after a long day's work.
As for her, well...
1) She doesn't do the housework
2) She has never volunteered to pay for the child's bills at all.
3) She doesn't manage her own house admin - aka her income taxes, her insurance premiums, her Medisave contribution, etc.
4) She doesn't pay for the house except for the downpayment. 100% of the payment via my CPF.
5) She doesn't contribute to our joint account of $200 a month. I have to cover for her $200.
6) She doesn't contribute to our child's savings account of $100 a month.
7) She doesn't need to pay for the household bills.
8) She doesn't send the child to school at all (understandable since she's working night shifts, but its just a rant).
9) She coughs up $10K for the family car, borrows $10,000 from our joint account (which I had been contributing to silently monthly) and another $20,000 from our child's savings account for her portion for the family car (which she returned it later) and I have been paying all subsequent related expenses for the car thereafter. She doesn't even need to pay for petrol!!
10) She sprained her foot, insisted on going to work even though I kept telling not to, decided to go home in the middle of the night cos her foot was killing her, limped back home, started banging the door instead of opening it and when I woke up, she instantly gave me a slap.
11) I actively avoid calling her during the day as I know she will be asleep and wanted her to get some rest. But at night, its the reverse since she is working, so she'd wanna call me cos she is awake and working.
And now, she's threatening divorce because "I am not facing up to "the problem", not meeting her expectation and playing victim." and told me to just pack up with my child, return to my mother's and she's not going to fight for custody because "that's my daughter." And she can live however she like.
Sorry for the really long rant.
I do have every opportunity and ability to wring her for maintenance in the Family Courts if I do want, but I am not doing it cos I don't wanna touch a cent of hers.
In case u guys are wondering. No, she's not a sex worker. In the healthcare line.
It doesn't help when I had tolerated my MIL staying with us, her MIL being a cultist in JW, bad mouthing me to my daughter in front of me (but fortunately, my daughter's close to me) and to add insult to injury - I had helped her find an excellent tenant for her house, got a really good rental price to contribute to her retirement income, and she doesn't have to pay a single cent when I repaired quite abit of stuff that's falling apart in her house. I did took back the repair costs from her later, to the tune of $5000 (and I overdrafted my credit card on some months for those repairs and replacements!), my MIL started whining to her sisters within earshot of my wife who later confronted me why I took money from my MIL.
What do u think I shld do? Should I just initiate or wait for her to initiate? Or maybe just pray and hope she will die in a random accident and at least things won't end messily.
Seriously, other than the lack of sex (when u are too fucking tired to even fap and cum; much less sustain an erection) and a single deaf ear (cause of which is unknown, specialists I had visited claimed it may be stress), I am really wondering if she had just went too far and kept asking for divorce on slightest things.
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