In love with a gal just because of wonderful sex?

neocheang · #1 26-07-2013, 01:57 AM

Hi guys. Might sound stupid but please bear with me, Hopping to get some advice from here.

Am actually in love with a gal (local) that I had bedded just a couple of months ago. Sex was WONDERFUL ever since then. We can make out at least 4 times every time we meet up. Once we had about 15 times in 3 days....( am an old dude liao...mid 30s). N btw, we get to know each other due to some business related stuff.
Anyway. Along the way we would do other couple stuff like dinner , drinks n movies.quite close for a couple of weeks. Wehad so much fun! She's quite a decent gal......lately she's been giving me the cold shoulder. Reason given. She suddenly doesn't want to commite into a relationship ( she has been single for quite sometime)
That broke my heart alot.....very deep.
Was wondering.do some bros here actually fall in love with a gal just because of good sex? N can't bear to leave her just because of it? Pls advise guys

jnudes · #2 26-07-2013, 06:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by neocheang

That broke my heart alot.....very deep.
Was wondering.do some bros here actually fall in love with a gal just because of good sex? N can't bear to leave her just because of it? Pls advise guys

I used to think like you now 10 years ago. I realize your intention for her is sincere, however, she thinks differently. If guys can fuck and dump a gal, so can a gal. In this case you became the victim. Since you fall for her quite deep, will take some time to recover. Love cannot be forced, since she want to remain single, just let her that way. Simply forget her and move on with your life.

sammyboyfor · #3 26-07-2013, 06:18 AM

That's not love that's raging hormones and elevated Oxytocin levels.

hamsapkwai · #4 26-07-2013, 07:13 AM

yes its difficult to find good sex and yes its also difficult to walk away from good sex when you find it.

girls can just turn it off and walk away from a relationship like theres a switch somewhere

maybe she found your performance lacking?

heineken · #5 26-07-2013, 09:06 AM

Bro, have to move on. I had a same experience with u but the gal i only out to have fun. me and her had a wonderful time in bed for a few months and she said she needs new guys to satisify her. from there on we never contact.
Just to bare in mind, we do have our fun but we put in too much of feeling into it.

see see only · #6 26-07-2013, 09:11 AM

We dont call having sex with feeling as "MAKE LOVE" for nothing

In my opinion, though most (trying to act like a saint) will say NO , but actually many human out there including myself is YES....

neocheang · #7 26-07-2013, 09:47 AM

Bro, u r so right on this part....I did indeed put in lots of feelings in it....and partly because she did some actions like letting me mix around some of her close friends, making me believe that we r in a relationship. And just took her 2 days to change her mind and say "let's become friends" . I can't take it. Heart damn pain......
Thanks for the advise bro...

Quote:

Originally Posted by heineken

Bro, have to move on. I had a same experience with u but the gal i only out to have fun. me and her had a wonderful time in bed for a few months and she said she needs new guys to satisify her. from there on we never contact.
Just to bare in mind, we do have our fun but we put in too much of feeling into it.

heineken · #8 26-07-2013, 09:54 AM

Time will heal the pain.

Greendevil · #9 26-07-2013, 10:07 AM

Bro everyone had their story to tell on how their relationship started. No right no wrong on this. What matter most is the decision we make today. Based on the information and instinct you have today, make the best decision. Don't worry abt if the future will turn out in whichever manner or making a wrong decision for the future cos you making it with the best you can today.

Go enjoy your life to the fullest and live with no regret.

Fapatron · #10 26-07-2013, 10:10 AM

Not to be mean or anything but like other bros have said here, it seems like she saw your relationship to be one similar to friends with benefits, not a serious one. Anyway, its best if you move on, if she already sees your relationship in such a manner then you should just stop chasing after her for a serious relationship. Don't worry bro, I'm sure other men have experienced the same thing, it all boils down to letting it go.

neocheang · #11 26-07-2013, 10:21 AM

Thanks bro. Just feel so damn stupid on how I as a man....would actually fall in love just because of good sex.... I can fully understand tat if she's those slut type... But..doesn't seems otherwise. Thanks a lot for advice bro. Guess its also my karma for breaking to many hearts in the past.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greendevil

Bro everyone had their story to tell on how their relationship started. No right no wrong on this. What matter most is the decision we make today. Based on the information and instinct you have today, make the best decision. Don't worry abt if the future will turn out in whichever manner or making a wrong decision for the future cos you making it with the best you can today.

Go enjoy your life to the fullest and live with no regret.

romidogdog · #12 27-07-2013, 01:58 PM

Bro , I guess you are not the first guy to have sex with her. maybe she is the type that like to have different guy to have sex with her. maybe she enjoy been this way, so don't take it too seriously, just treat her as a FB n move on.

flowbow · #13 28-07-2013, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by see see only

We dont call having sex with feeling as "MAKE LOVE" for nothing

In my opinion, though most (trying to act like a saint) will say NO , but actually many human out there including myself is YES....

I have to agree with this, sex to me really is making love. After sex, very hard to not develop feelings for the other person. Especially if there is already an initial attraction. And the more we have sex, the stronger the feelings get... It really is no wonder that sex is termed as making love.

saabking · #14 30-07-2013, 12:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greendevil

Bro everyone had their story to tell on how their relationship started. No right no wrong on this. What matter most is the decision we make today. Based on the information and instinct you have today, make the best decision. Don't worry abt if the future will turn out in whichever manner or making a wrong decision for the future cos you making it with the best you can today.

Go enjoy your life to the fullest and live with no regret.

yup - well said. Lol - I have chinese version below:

一切只求顺其自然。
别说我不在意，在意了又能怎样？我只不过是懂得了，看开了！　　　　　　
谁不虚伪，谁不善变，谁都不是谁的谁。又何必把一些人，一些事看的那么重要。

thewildone · #15 30-07-2013, 11:45 PM

Bro TS, do you recall at the beginning if you were feeling a bit guilty if you didn't take the connection seriously? Then decided to take up the 'manly' responsibility to date her?

In any case, while you were both casual-dating, perhaps you didn't observe the tell-tale signs that she wasn't interested in a relationship. This is really a lesson that a long-lasting relationship rarely starts with sex.

Just like you would unlikely meet your life-partner while both drunk at a disco.