Life emotional setbacks. What would u do?

[etct88]

Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki

You mean EVERYTIME?

Taken for a ride? How so?

No offend. Could it be something wrong with yourself and your way of handling girls?

The coin have 2 sides............ we hear one side.

[Impurfact]

Thanks so much for sharing. Really touching.

[wingsafeather]

seems pretty much the case of one (or rather a few) bad apples spoiling the bunch.
dont judge just based on the few u have experienced.

as for buddies thinking ur a looser, well i guess its time to reasses yourself.
girls like guys with self confidence. if ur going after them thinking of failure u might as well not bother at all coz confidence is an attractive aura. we like guys we can depend on not those who give up even before the chase has started.

[NewMike1304k]

Not trying to say anything, but we humans have a tendency to choose our counterparts based on certain pre-requisites and this in turn steers us to wards certain types of girls. For example, a quite guy may like to have some life in their life and therefore prefer to find lively and fun loving gals. Opposites attract, but then one day she may find that it is better to find a fun loving guy and decide to end the relationship. We may also be looking for different things in a relationship and may be out of sync with the girls. Sometimes it can also be that we may be making a mountain out of a molehill like a girl just is a close friend but we think they are interested in us and we fall in love with them only to find that they were never interested.

So in all, it is not our fault and sometimes it is not theirs. But just take a step back and consider where it went wrong, how it went wrong and then we try to find a solution from there. Investing in any relationship takes time and effort and if it busts, it will leave you drained. So the sanest advice is to be wary of starting something and if it seems like its not gonna end well, then why bother even starting it.

Just my 2 cents... Peace

[frivolous_ami]

Thanks for the replies,

Have been working. To briefly explain my story on why I posed the earlier questions about emotional setbacks, I dated a fair number of singapore gals before.

I dated gal 1 back in mid 2000. We shared a lot, but broke up eventually. She backstabbed me by sending all the poison mails to the people in my social circle. Held hands, but nothing more than that. Bad enough....

Gal 2 I dated was about a year later. She was an overseas graduate from a rich family. One day, her relative saw me at her place and asked why I was there. Obviously, see me no up. She expect me to be the perfect bf. Have to remember what she like and what she doesn't. If she want bar chor mee to have vinegar, there is no 2nd way about it. She disappeared suddenly after a few months. Later, she sms me saying don't want continue liao. :\

Gal 3 I dated was lagi best.... first month already started asking me to buy things for her. Every date must eat "ho liao". After a while, very obvious she only wanted to fleece me off. Plus, no hand holding, no hugging, no s3x, no kiss and no visit to her house. Even after my best efforts at moving her with bouquets of roses and time invested.

I don't think I did anything wrong. At least, gal 2 had very good upbringing. I find that after everything how to believe that there will be a gal worthwhile striving for. To quote one guy, he says "do not make someone a priority, when you are only an option to them." How to have a normal gf?

May be the problem lied in me having that easy to "con" face. I don't seek sympathy here, but keen to know how other guys have dealt with similar problems.

For the buddies who spoke of my louya "track record", i know who my friends are. Its disparaging. End of the day, love is blind and love is a pursuit for what one believes is true. May be, it is like what some said before, "Sometimes, what is real is more fake than real. What is fake ironically is more real than real."

[see see only]

TS,

Take responsible for all the 3 failed relationship ... and soul search yourself.

But does not mean all the faults goes to you, nevertheless remember to handle the 4th one right with all the 3 experiences.

[scaredycat]

play with their mind... dont let them control u...

dont be dishearten, the 4th one might be better!

[lalakers]

even if there are none out there for you, I think it would still be wasteful if you despair with such a thing.

there's so much more to do and see out there, don't let sth like this stop you.

good luck!

[Chanelfingers]

maybe i am an old romantic at heart...
I always feel It is better to have loved and fallen
then never having the courage to love at all.
Anyways, it just meant you haven't found the right gal.
You put ur feelings and emotions on someone who don't reciprocate.

[jenny]

Dear brothers and sisters, relationships are something that is very funny feeling that you can't fall for it just let it be natural. Treasure our life be positive and happy always

[Ansel]

If a relationship is built base on lies what kind of an outcome do you expect? For me it always the right girl at the wrong time or right time but the wrong girl. People always say forgive and forget but you can forgive but never forget if not you will never learn from your mistake.

[joew2005]

人生如戏 , 戏如人生.
好或是不好 , 日子还是要過.

[JacqueMerlin]

Originally Posted by frivolous_ami

Appreciate everyone's reply. Very diplomatic views...//... faith in marriage and relationship. Normal to anyone out here?

Haha.. I must post this. I have a friend who's married to a PRC for 3 years and now in the middle of a divorce proceeding, also a hopeless sucker for girls no matter how much I chastised him. I asked him to join me overseas, guided him to the postings in SBF, gave him numbers of girls who are both pretty and great fucks. Tried to help him many times to see the light. But he still insists on being the sucker. He refuses to pay $100 for a great short term chick or $150 for an overnight bonk but is willing to pay thousands on a girl for 5 days and then gets very emotionally attached to her.

Last week, in the middle of the night at 4am on a Saturday morning, I received a call from him telling me about him stranded at Aljunied with a blown tyre. I rushed down immediately and saw him along the streets near Geylang and started to survey his tyre only to find that he drove on flat tyre even though he knew the tyre was flat. I was on the verge of knocking his head and asked him why did he do that? He said he has to send a Viet girl back home and she was drunk. He didn't want her to go off alone. So he has to press on. (he spent alomst $500 doing replacing the tyre and wee hours towing) This Viet girl is here on social visit pass and he got to know her from his recent trip to Vietnam to meet another girl he got to know on Facebook. He foolishly added her into his facebook and allowed her to upload their pictures online. He even went to meet her parents and slept over at her place. What a complete idiot. Then comes back and asks me how and what to do now that this girl treats him like a boyfriend. I told him she treats him like a sucker and not a boyfriend.

He flew over to Vietnam on arbitruary basis just to look for this Vietnamese girl he found online and had been chatting and doing cyber sex for a long time. He disappeared for a week leading to my worries. The best thing was that he squandered thousands on one girl splurging on LV bags, Burberry bags, Iphones etc etc... And in return the girl lets him fuck her. He returns to Singapore with her friend who's here on social visit pass for obvious purpose. His wife is now in China and has no fucking idea when is she coming back. And the fool brought this Vietnamese girl back home!!! And in her white card, he lets the girl fill in his address while entering Singapore. And last week, I found that while in Singapore, he bought her also LV bags, IPhone etc...

He always rejects my suggestion of going for paid bonking in the other countries. I told him the kind of money he splurges can give him more chicks over more days overseas. But he just refuses to listen. He is a sucker. I have given up on him totally. And when he comes to me telling me what stupid things he did (yes, he admits that what he did was stupid), I get incensed and told him off.

And prior to these 2 Vietnamese girls, he was involved with another Thai girl. all while being still married to his PRC wife who's now in a divorce battle and alimony is a serious issue. He made losses in his investments lately and has been selling off some of his cars.

Talking about suckers? He is the biggest sucker I have ever seen.

[RawIsWar]

Originally Posted by JacqueMerlin

Haha.. I must post this. I have a friend who's married to a PRC for 3 years and now in the middle of a divorce proceeding, also a hopeless sucker for girls no matter how much I chastised him. I asked him to join me overseas, guided him to the postings in SBF, gave him numbers of girls who are both pretty and great fucks. Tried to help him many times to see the light. But he still insists on being the sucker. He refuses to pay $100 for a great short term chick or $150 for an overnight bonk but is willing to pay thousands on a girl for 5 days and then gets very emotionally attached to her.

Last week, in the middle of the night at 4am on a Saturday morning, I received a call from him telling me about him stranded at Aljunied with a blown tyre. I rushed down immediately and saw him along the streets near Geylang and started to survey his tyre only to find that he drove on flat tyre even though he knew the tyre was flat. I was on the verge of knocking his head and asked him why did he do that? He said he has to send a Viet girl back home and she was drunk. He didn't want her to go off alone. So he has to press on. (he spent alomst $500 doing replacing the tyre and wee hours towing) This Viet girl is here on social visit pass and he got to know her from his recent trip to Vietnam to meet another girl he got to know on Facebook. He foolishly added her into his facebook and allowed her to upload their pictures online. He even went to meet her parents and slept over at her place. What a complete idiot. Then comes back and asks me how and what to do now that this girl treats him like a boyfriend. I told him she treats him like a sucker and not a boyfriend.

He flew over to Vietnam on arbitruary basis just to look for this Vietnamese girl he found online and had been chatting and doing cyber sex for a long time. He disappeared for a week leading to my worries. The best thing was that he squandered thousands on one girl splurging on LV bags, Burberry bags, Iphones etc etc... And in return the girl lets him fuck her. He returns to Singapore with her friend who's here on social visit pass for obvious purpose. His wife is now in China and has no fucking idea when is she coming back. And the fool brought this Vietnamese girl back home!!! And in her white card, he lets the girl fill in his address while entering Singapore. And last week, I found that while in Singapore, he bought her also LV bags, IPhone etc...

He always rejects my suggestion of going for paid bonking in the other countries. I told him the kind of money he splurges can give him more chicks over more days overseas. But he just refuses to listen. He is a sucker. I have given up on him totally. And when he comes to me telling me what stupid things he did (yes, he admits that what he did was stupid), I get incensed and told him off.

And prior to these 2 Vietnamese girls, he was involved with another Thai girl. all while being still married to his PRC wife who's now in a divorce battle and alimony is a serious issue. He made losses in his investments lately and has been selling off some of his cars.

Talking about suckers? He is the biggest sucker I have ever seen.

Don't tell me your friend's name is Alexander?

[JacqueMerlin]

Originally Posted by RawIsWar

Don't tell me your friend's name is Alexander?

No. Not that. That means he is not alone.

He makes me feel exasperated.