Marrying A Thai ger

[Peter_North]

Originally Posted by norice

Peter North,

Thanks for your insightful information. If I do settle down with a Thai girl, I don't mind supporting her for rest of her life but I have second thought of supporting her family for rest of their life. When can I stop? I'm hoping to meet someone without large family or from a well to do family. But why would a girl from well to do family wants to settle down with me?

I hope, when I retire in Bangkok, all the single brothers who resides in Bangkok, will meet regularly for drinks to discuss about ways and means of meeting nonworking girls for possible longterm relationship! By that time, we'll be tired of butterflying and wants to settle down with a nice Thai lady! Everyone are welcome to join our fraternity!

I think as another Bro has pointed out, you've been harping on the same slogan about having the financial to means to support her. Your thinking is very logical, and I'm very sure it will work to perfection in Singapore. But Thailand ?

The dimensions are different. There is a natural affinity between Thai girls and Thai men. This is not something that you can break apart and ease yourself into a relationship. Yes, money will provide the necessary lubricant, but bear in mind that when you use money as a lubricant you may end up attracting girls you detest. You may not only have to support her family; you may have to support her boyfriend as well.

If a girl can fake orgasm in bed, she can fake anything including gentleness and demureness. You use shrimp as a bait, you get fish. You use money as a bait, you know what you will get. She will fake anything for you.

There is another factor. You've talking about retirement. If you're going to do it after your retirement, exactly at what age are you going to make your move to hitch a Thai girl ? By which time, what is the age group of Thai girls will you be considering ? Again the dimensions differ according to the perimeters that you set.

If you're considering a well educated Thai girl with good background, your money is less likely to have as much an impact vis a vis a poor village girl struggling in BKK. You will have to supplement your wealth with good looks, something which most Singapore men are not famous for.

[pussyman72]

Originally Posted by Peter_North

I think as another Bro has pointed out, you've been harping on the same slogan about having the financial to means to support her. Your thinking is very logical, and I'm very sure it will work to perfection in Singapore. But Thailand ?

There is another factor. You've talking about retirement. If you're going to do it after your retirement, exactly at what age are you going to make your move to hitch a Thai girl ? By which time, what is the age group of Thai girls will you be considering ? Again the dimensions differ according to the perimeters that you set.

If you're considering a well educated Thai girl with good background, your money is less likely to have as much an impact vis a vis a poor village girl struggling in BKK. You will have to supplement your wealth with good looks, something which most Singapore men are not famous for.

well said bro. agree with what u said

[pussyman72]

Originally Posted by Peter_North

When a Thai girl marries a lazy drinker, gambler and womanizer, which Thai girls often do, the Thai girl will have to support the lifestyle of her lazy husband. So in the meantime, the father and filial piety will have to eat grass.

It's like the equivalent of Foreign Business Act for marriage with a foreigner.

sigh sad to said this wont change their mindset. i know some bros wife do not ask for anything when marry and even they setup a family in sgp they never really send money back to take care of the parents.

the girl's parents also never ask for anything. but my friend just help to build a house for them after few yrs later.

sadly not alot will be like this.

[Peter_North]

Originally Posted by pussyman72

sigh sad to said this wont change their mindset. i know some bros wife do not ask for anything when marry and even they setup a family in sgp they never really send money back to take care of the parents.

the girl's parents also never ask for anything. but my friend just help to build a house for them after few yrs later.

sadly not alot will be like this.

Much will depend on the foundation on which the relationship is built. If you start with "I'm able to take care of your livelihood better than your poor Thai men" nothing will ever change because you laid the cornerstone of the relationship on the same principle as the girl.

On the other hand if you think you've a good character and you're going to use your good character to truly win the heart of the Thai girl, chances are you will run into a brickwall. You will truly need the elements of 天時，地利，人和 These 3 elements are essential for success in anything, not just relationship. In a foreign land, these 3 elements are even harder to come by, especially if you don't speak their language.

It's much easier to use money to buy a relationship with a Thai girl, then you don't need the 3 elements. A Thai girl can use filial piety to "sweet coat" what is essentially a business transaction and make her act of fleecing from her foreign husband a motherland virtue. The foreigner buying a relationship will need to psycho himself too and not think of it as a business transaction.

[vmtech]

Originally Posted by Peter_North

blhblahblah

hey bro how's life in bkk so far ?

[FL Lover]

Well.... the point that we are stressing over here is to tell bros who are really wanted to marry their tiraks .... be mentally and finanically prepared to support the ger in whatever she wants.

1) Communication is already a problem to some bros who have a half past 6 thai and some thai gers dont even know english at all. Do you want your wife to start teaching your kids to speak thai?

2) Social acceptance of thai gers in SG. If you marry a thai ger, there will be pple gossiping on the background of the ger and how u know the ger etc. If your friend marry a thai, dont you ask your friend how he met and dont you start guessing what she is working as perviously? You cant avoid this kind of thing.

3) Culture difference. Some bros had pointed out that mindset of thai gers when they got married to a foreigner. They always had this mindset that my RICH RICH husband can support my ENTIRE FAMILY which can include RELATIVES AND EVEN CLOSE FIRENDS... yes close friends which they often call SISTERS.

4) Jobs. Marrying a thai ger in sg means that the ger most likely had to stay at home unless she is highly educated enough to fget a work permit in sg. In SG, even got couples complaining that life is tough with both spouses working. Life might be stressful if you are the only sole breadwinner. Sad.

Unless you want to tell me you are going to stay in BKK forever, then the problem might not as bad as what I had said over here. Thier society and their lifestyle are quite opened. But you ended up with 1 more problem.

Since the thai society is so opened, would you not worry that your future daughter will end up as a FL or WL in sg..... hahahhaaa.... I really cant imagine that.

I have upped WL or FL who told me that their father is a sg chinese man.... quite sad to hear that but that's their life.

Of course, I am not saying marrying a thai is 100% total failure. I have seen cases which works. But lots of commitements on both sides are required.

[OceanEleven]

Originally Posted by FL Lover

1) Communication is already a problem to some bros who have a half past 6 thai and some thai gers dont even know english at all. Do you want your wife to start teaching your kids to speak thai? .

May be true but depends on where the kids are raise really, in Sing no one taught us Hokkien or Canto but still we managed thru the years.

Originally Posted by FL Lover

2) Social acceptance of thai gers in SG. If you marry a thai ger, there will be pple gossiping on the background of the ger and how u know the ger etc. If your friend marry a thai, dont you ask your friend how he met and dont you start guessing what she is working as perviously? You cant avoid this kind of thing. .

It is always the case be it PRC, Viet, or even M'sians but more for Thai I guess. But again, this is my wife we are talking about, you may talk but just dont let it get to my ears.

Originally Posted by FL Lover

3) Culture difference. Some bros had pointed out that mindset of thai gers when they got married to a foreigner. They always had this mindset that my RICH RICH husband can support my ENTIRE FAMILY which can include RELATIVES AND EVEN CLOSE FIRENDS... yes close friends which they often call SISTERS.

Not unusual, it would be mainly what backgroud did the girl come from? If we are talking about ex WLs then the tendency of having a unusual "large" family is possible. But in general, many girls from decent family will unlikely face such problems. It is a matter of perspective, what girls are we talking about here.

Originally Posted by FL Lover

4) Jobs. Marrying a thai ger in sg means that the ger most likely had to stay at home unless she is highly educated enough to fget a work permit in sg. In SG, even got couples complaining that life is tough with both spouses working. Life might be stressful if you are the only sole breadwinner. Sad.

More of a what you want in life. Many couples who are both working, having a nice car, HDB Exec with 100K reno and a maid, wants 2 Europe holidays a year, frequent spas, facials etc and yes this is stressful and I am for sure life is indeed tough.

Originally Posted by FL Lover

Unless you want to tell me you are going to stay in BKK forever, then the problem might not as bad as what I had said over here. Thier society and their lifestyle are quite opened. But you ended up with 1 more problem.
Since the thai society is so opened, would you not worry that your future daughter will end up as a FL or WL in sg..... hahahhaaa.... I really cant imagine that.
Of course, I am not saying marrying a thai is 100% total failure. I have seen cases which works. But lots of commitements on both sides are required.

Try not counting the chicks before the eggs hatch, life not as bad and such problem unlikely to happen unless you really sucks at being dad.

[Peter_North]

Originally Posted by vmtech

hey bro how's life in bkk so far ?

Life is obviously much better compared to Singapore. Once I touched down on Suvarnabhumi Airport, I was immediately upgraded to the upper middle class society In Singapore, struggling lower middle class.

BTW, I'm told by my VISA RUN agent that when I go for my 30-day extension at Suan Pluu, they will add another 30 days to my expiry date on the passport, and not according to the date I present my passport, so that it makes no difference even if I go one week earlier.

[norice]

Peter North,

If you're renting an apartment, what area do you live and approximately what is your monthly rent?

I will be moving to Bangkok permanently within 22 months, so I'm just curious where everyone lives.

[FL Lover]

Bro OceanEleven, marrying a thai ger is not as simple as you claimed to be.... anyway it is up to ... if u choose to marry a thai ger... its yuor life, not mine.

Just to get some bros to give it a thought about marrying thai ger. We are not living in this world alone. Pple judge you by your actions... hahaha... For example what can you do when pple starts talking about the thai ger that you have married and you overhead it? You cant stop them and you cant do anything about it..... That's life... my friend.

Also who dont want a better and stable life. If your wife can help your life become more stable and better for your kids in future... dont you want it? Two pair of hands earning $$ is bette than all of your family waiting for YOU TO BRING $$ BACK. tio boi tio?

Would it be better if you and your wife can communicate better? Less quarrels and less misunderstanding. It's like a chicken and duck talking if your wife had a half past 6 english n she does not understand chinese.

So what I have just said it to let other bros know what are the pros n cons about marrying a thai ger in SG. Definitely not a discrimination against bros who are going to marry thai ger.... We are in a forum to share and not to sweet talk about anything.

It is better to get real and start thinking about all these if your future wife is a thai..... rather than regret later... No one will suffer except you.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by FL Lover

Just to get some bros to give it a thought about marrying thai ger. We are not living in this world alone. Pple judge you by your actions... hahaha... For example what can you do when pple starts talking about the thai ger that you have married and you overhead it? You cant stop them and you cant do anything about it..... That's life... my friend.

ya, but do u want to care about these ignorant people (me included, 1st perception lah...) who stereotype thai gers as confirmed WLs??? it is always better not to get angry with stupid people, no?

Also who dont want a better and stable life. If your wife can help your life become more stable and better for your kids in future... dont you want it? Two pair of hands earning $$ is bette than all of your family waiting for YOU TO BRING $$ BACK. tio boi tio?

u r stereotyping, my friend... my guy friend got married to a thai girl recently and he settled in bangkok right after that. i know the thai girl cos she was previously my colleague before she moved to another company. she has a masters degree from the chulalongkorn university in language and deals exclusively with the japanese market. no, not FL but investment consultant who makes more than USD150k a year. if it were u, can u tahan???

Would it be better if you and your wife can communicate better? Less quarrels and less misunderstanding. It's like a chicken and duck talking if your wife had a half past 6 english n she does not understand chinese.

love will keep us alive, no???

but like u said, just sharing and no offence meant.

[vmtech]

Originally Posted by Peter_North

Life is obviously much better compared to Singapore. Once I touched down on Suvarnabhumi Airport, I was immediately upgraded to the upper middle class society In Singapore, struggling lower middle class.

BTW, I'm told by my VISA RUN agent that when I go for my 30-day extension at Suan Pluu, they will add another 30 days to my expiry date on the passport, and not according to the date I present my passport, so that it makes no difference even if I go one week earlier.

ur agent must be sleeping or dont understand what u mean.
i remmebred clearly i went 3 days early because the expiry of mine passport was on a monday and that monday was a holiday, so i went on a thursday (thursday was a holiday also, so LL i go back on friday)
and i was extended 30days as of friday, not monday.

[naemlo]

Originally Posted by norice

If you're renting an apartment, what area do you live and approximately what is your monthly rent?

For me ratachada, not because of MPs there but because of location and best of all MRT.

[vmtech]

Originally Posted by norice

Peter North,

If you're renting an apartment, what area do you live and approximately what is your monthly rent?

I will be moving to Bangkok permanently within 22 months, so I'm just curious where everyone lives.

i think he mentioned he was kindda my wife's neighbour lol around param9 area

Originally Posted by naemlo

For me ratachada, not because of MPs there but because of location and best of all MRT.

i agree, i got my wife's apartment 5mins walk into pacharatpbamben road which is opposite hwaykwang market. also it is 5 mins away from the subway, 1 station from Carrefour, robinson and esplande.

everything can be done there and here! no need to even go to sukhumvit to watch a movie . to me that area is more or less the best location and also it isnt very far away from town . Pattanakan and srinakarin is good places to live in too but for me it is too far awy from town, and transport around there are not very goood, the place i used to stay in (suk 101/1) i need to take songteaw out to the paksoi and den take a freakin motorcyc just to get to on nut bts. tts already 40thb, + another 40 to town via train. make no diff to take a taxi.

[FL Lover]

Bro AXL, how many bros can be so heng to get a thai ger like your friend? How many can make it to come to sg to work and get a work permit to settle down?

Do you know that thai degree holders are not that "valuable"? The senerio I am talking about is for bros who intend to marry a thai ger and settle in SG....The way you are talking about is just a few lucky ones who got married to a rich or capable thai gers.... but how many can be so heng?

Most of the thai gers still depend a lot on the foreign husband.... even though they can be degree holders or what.... Also love can keep u apart... FOR how long can love keep u apart when you are faced with different thinking and cutlure differences from yuor thai wife?

U never hear of such phrases... when the tree falls, the monkey run. When the nest drops, both birds fly.....

This is not sterotyping... just mentioning the facts of life. Sad but true..bro.

Of course if you are saying that you are going to move to BKK forever with yor wife... then it is a different story. The living standard OVER IN BKK is so much lower than living standard in SG.